That Was a Step

With snow still on the ground from this weekend's storm, I wasn't really interested in going out to the track today. In any case, I didn't think the workout was that tough - 3 x 1600 meters. Three mile repeats, with 1 minute rest in between. That shouldn't be too bad. And the pace, well, it was derived from my half marathon time, so that means I should be able to do it. Right?

Mile and half warm up, then into the first mile repeat. Not feeling too bad. It's definitely a challenging pace.  I get to the 1/2 mile mark. It would be about right to be stopping now - IOW this was feeling like a good pace for 1/2 mile intervals, but I had another 1/2 mile to go. All I could think of during the second 1/2 mile was that I had made a mistake. I got the pace wrong. This is too fast for a mile repeat...

During my 1 minute rest interval, I ran up stairs and grabbed my copy of Run Less Run Faster, and quickly flipped to the page with paces for key workout #1 (intervals).  Bummer.  I had the right pace. Given the limits of the treadmill, I was 2 seconds per mile faster than the target pace.  I hurried back down stairs and got back on the treadmill for mile 2 (okay, so I probably got more than 1 minute of rest, but I did go up 2 flights of stairs).  About a quarter of a mile in, I, well, I, okay, I panicked.  "I can't do this..."  And I quickly hit the Slower button on the treadmill.  Now I'm going 3 seconds per mile slower than target pace, rather than 2 seconds faster.  All of my usual tricks, like "relax", "focus on form", etc, did nothing to help.  This was hard.  Somehow, I hung on to finish.

OK, just one more.  There are points in difficult workouts where the psychology of it turns in your favor, and this was the first one of those points.  I had already done two of these and all I had to do was one more.  How bad can that be...  Too quickly the last interval starts and after about a 1/4 mile, I'm having trouble with breathing and form.  Focus.  You can do this.  1/2 mile to go and I'm feeling oxygen deprivation, but now I hit the second psychological turning point - only 1/2 mile to go.  I've done 1/2 mile intervals at this pace many times and always been able to finish.  I now know I can finish, it's just a question of hanging on.  1/4 mile to go and my form is a complete mess.  I can't take in any more air with each breath, but what happens it to?  It doesn't feel like I'm getting any of it.  Last 220m.  Hang on.  You can do this.  Last 110m.  Relax, oh never mind, I'm way past that.  Last 50m.  Keep breathing.  Keep your feet moving.  Oh my gosh.  I'm done.  Hit Pause.  Off the treadmill, for a short 1 minute walking break.

After the 1 minute rest, I surprisingly don't feel too bad.  Then back on to finish with a 1.5 mile cool down.  I'm completely drenched in sweat, but really I feel pretty good.  Still, I'm sure glad there isn't a 4th mile repeat on the workout.  But you know, now I'm thinking I could probably do it if I had to.  I'm just really glad i don't have to.  Reflecting back on slowing down the pace, I have this sense that I failed the work out.  Or at least that I could have had a greater sense of satisfaction if I stayed with the original pace.  I ran the second 2 miles at 5 seconds per mile slower than the first, and that isn't much, but I backed down.  It was a mental defeat more than a physical one.  I suspect I could have held on at the faster pace.

I believe that a big part of what interval workouts are all about is mental toughness.  There is no question that intervals improve your speed.  But they also generally give you the knowledge that you can perform at a particular pace when you feel like you've got nothing left.  You take that with you into a race.  "I've felt much worse than this and still run a ____ (fill in the blank with mile / half mile  / quarter mile) faster than this."  Of course, you only get to take that in with you if you stick to your workouts, and never quit.  If you ever quit, you've got a new voice in your head that competes very loudly with the "I've felt much worse" voice.  The quitting voice says, "This is too much, too tough, conditions aren't right, this isn't your day..."  and on and on.  It takes many subsequent successes to put a workout behind you where you back down.

The first step in my marathon training plan.  I'm afraid I got off on a weak foot.  Not a bad foot.  I didn't quit.  I did finish.  And just 3 seconds per mile slower than target pace.  But I did back down because I was afraid it was too hard.  That's not a habit I want to start.  Boy, that first step was a big one.  We'll see how the next one goes, but thankfully tomorrow is a cross training day.  Then - up tempo.